I actually feel like I have been working a lot this summer, even though it was my "vacation" time. I loved being off during these past 3 months. It may be one of my favorite things about being a teacher. :) It has been lots of time with Tyler (my fav hobbie) and helping him. I have been on a 10 day mission trip with Tyler and students in the youth group, to church camp for a week, helped plan the Mexico trip before we went, mowed our yard several times, finally finished our scrapbook, and now have taken care of my husband who just had surgery.
BUT, I have also been on a week trip back to east Texas to see my family & niece, gone to Snyder for the 4th with Tyler, and also taken a trip to Cancun with Tyler.
WHAT A SUMMER IT HAS BEEN.
The Lord has taught me so much and I am still contemplating everything.
And now He is sending me back to teach for a 2nd yr. I have been reading another book about fear and anxiety called " Running Scared" by the same guy who wrote "When People Are Big and God is Small". I think sometimes, man I have a lot to be afraid of or worry over! What if I can't get pregnant? What if my new class has really poor behavior ? I have to deal with a new and different set of parents this year, what will they be like? I hope I will teach my new students as well as I did last year, I hope I will teach them better! Will I teach them to have character and not just math? What if I get too tired and stressed this year? What if I do get pregnant and then I'm tired all day at work or throwing up? Will I be able to share the gospel with any of my co-workers this year? What if i don't have the courage to? Lord, I don't want to fail you. I want to take hell and eternity seriously and use this job for your glory and will. Am I ready to be a mother? Are Tyler and I mature enough yet? How long will you make us wait? I am so excited...make me patient Lord.
These are fears I have been recently dealing with. But God is faithful to bear my burdens and carry them for me, all my fears. I remember a time in college when I was dealing with some stuff and my best friend, Melissa, wrote me a note and she said "You are safe in His hands" just thinking about that is such truth to my heart. No matter my fears or worries God has me in His hands!!!! His hands! Whew...that's awesome. And He holds these things and all I have to do is think about Him, pray, and worship him and know He will strengthen me and perservere me and no matter what happens He is still good and will always be good and I will spend eternity with Him..delighting in Him and being fullfilled by Him.
"delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not unto your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight."
1 comment:
Haley,
Know that your fears are legitmate but rest assured that you are, like Melissa said, safe in the Father's hands. Your worries are always going to change and it'll seem like they just get worse once you do become a mother. This verse always helps me out when I start to worry about all of the things going on in my life.
So we can confidently say. "The Lord is my helper; I will not fear; what can man do to me?" -Hebrews 13:6
I hope that brought you encouragement! I love ya girl and I am praying for you as always.
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